Yesterday on the birthday of the king, there was a suspicious puppetshow in Taksteeg, a side street from the busy shopping street of Kalverstraat. In this puppet show, the mayor, the king and a member of parliament were talking about how to make the city more wealthy. Their conclusion, in six months, all of the people in the city should be evicted and all of their homes should be converted to hotels. They were so happy with this plan that they started partying to an André Hazes junior techno remix. At this party, the MP sneaked out and went to the people, the MP told the people about their plans, and pleaded for a revolution and the beheading of the king. After a lot of screaming and rioting of the people, the guillotine was brought out, where the king met his faith, and the people reclaimed their city.
After this revolution, another city was also being reclaimed. Right above the puppet show, a banner which read “geen woning geen koning” (no home no king) was dropped. An old store had been squatted, right in the rich tourist and yuppy center of Amsterdam. The building has been empty for more than three years. The cops came, asked a neighbour how long it had been empty and told the squatters that they were not going to speed evict, and the regular procedure will happen. [Read More]